I know. This is a stupid idea.
I mean, everyone else is so busy engaging in shameless self promotion, that I thought it would help me stand out. Besides, people who engage in shameless self-promotion are eventually accused of engaging in shameful self-promotion anyway. So … cut right to the chase.
I’m sorry. You hate me already don’t you? It was a really stupid idea.
But maybe, if it is not too much trouble, I don’t want to put you out or anything, if you could, not to say you have to, take a faint glimmer of interest in this blog, it would be awesome. Though not too awesome, I wouldn’t want to make a fool of myself with an ego that was ten sizes too big for me.
I mean, I don’t even know how to tell the difference between shameless self-promotion and shameful self-promotion. I mean, just when I think I have it figured out, someone claims someone else I was sure was shameless was most shameful indeed. What would happen if I tried to do it and got it wrong? I could never live it down. Everyone would be looking at me and thinking “You shameless self-promoter you! You should be ashamed of yourself!” And that would be just awful. I mean, shouldn’t it be easy to be able to tell shameless self promotion from shameful self promotion? They aren’t synonyms or anything. I guess it means I’m just stupid or something.
Oh God, I feel terrible just thinking about it. I’m going to go under a rock and hide. Maybe it will squish me. Problem solved.
But really, even just a passing shrug to know you at least glanced my way before dismissing me. I mean, unless you have a shoulder injury or something and that would aggravate it. Then I would feel all bad that you injured yourself more. Maybe if you just gave the affect of having looked, so I wouldn’t have to be ashamed at the horrible things you saw here. That would be okay too.
I’m sorry. Please don’t hold it against me. It was a stupid idea.